Squidly Didly
25-08-2003, 08:59 PM
Forgive me for I got bored
A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs. due to very serious health
risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an
ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM.
"Guaranteed. Yeah right!" he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls
them up and subscribes to the 3-day/10 pound weight loss program.
The next day there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands
before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old young lady dressed in nothing
but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces
herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If
you can catch me, you can have me!" Without a second thought he takes off
after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her
and has his way with her.
After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way
this company does business!" The same girl shows up for the next two days
and the same thing happens.
On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10
lb. as promised. He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound
program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most
stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing
nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If
you catch me, you can have me." He's out the door or after her like a shot.
This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but
when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. For the next four days,
the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day, he weighs
himself and found he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to
go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most
rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in
years"
The next day there's a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds a
muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a
sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you're mine."
A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs. due to very serious health
risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an
ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM.
"Guaranteed. Yeah right!" he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls
them up and subscribes to the 3-day/10 pound weight loss program.
The next day there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands
before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old young lady dressed in nothing
but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces
herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If
you can catch me, you can have me!" Without a second thought he takes off
after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her
and has his way with her.
After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way
this company does business!" The same girl shows up for the next two days
and the same thing happens.
On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10
lb. as promised. He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound
program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most
stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing
nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If
you catch me, you can have me." He's out the door or after her like a shot.
This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but
when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. For the next four days,
the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day, he weighs
himself and found he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to
go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most
rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in
years"
The next day there's a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds a
muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a
sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you're mine."