View Full Version : Satire. And those who don't quite get it.
gravelclimber
11-07-2006, 04:55 PM
Most people know satire when they see it. And if you've read THE ONION you'll know that's some pretty damn good satire.
Not anti-abortionist Pete from March Together For Life.
Check it out, it's gold:
http://marchtogether.blogspot.com/2006/07/murder-without-conscience.html
Murder without conscience
Here are some quotes from a pro-abortion person, Miss Caroline Weber, who wrote an article at The Onion online magazine.
When referring to the killing of her child she said:
"I am totally psyched for this abortion!"
"Those pro-life activists made it pretty clear that, unlike me, they actually think abortion is bad and to be avoided. Are they nuts? Abortion is the best!"
"It wasn't until now that I was lucky enough to be pregnant with a child I had no means to support."
"I just know it's going to be the best non-anesthetized invasive uterine surgery ever!"
Who does Miss Weber blame her abortion on? The pro-life movement.
"The funny thing is, I actually have the pro-life movement to thank for this opportunity."
It's our fault? She says:
"If my HMO wouldn't have bowed to their pressure not to cover oral contraceptives, I never would've gotten pregnant in the first place."
Sorry ma'am, if you hadn't had sex you wouldn't have gotten pregnant, it's not the HMO's fault for not supporting your promiscuity while not married.
To sum it up, Miss Weber said:
"I realize there are people who will criticize me, calling me selfish and immature because I took "the easy way out." I realize there are those who will condemn me to hell for what I'm about to do. Well, I don't care what they say: It's worth it for all the fun and laughs I'm going to have at the clinic. So listen up, world: I'm pro-abortion... and I love it! See you at my post-abortion party, everybody!"
Miss Weber, you have killed your child, which you admit is a baby/human being, intentionally. That does make you an admitted murderer. I'm not going to "condemn you to hell", I'm going to pray for your forgiveness and for the suffering which you will endure when you realize what you have done. Every baby you see from that moment on is going to wake you up to the realization that you killed your child.
Speak out against abortion. Don't just complain about it. Join the Monthly Call for Life at MonthlyCallForLife.com. We call, email and/or march to let our representatives know that we will not stop until they stop the killing of innocent human beings!
MonthlyCallForLife.com
United we stand - Divided they die - Pass it on
Oh my...
Then again, it's always the ones furtherest from the front line that make the most noise. Who'd bet Pete is probably a white middle aged middle class Christian man in a stable marriage? Just the sort of person to campaign against abortion, an entirely necessary thing for many. He's probably living in his own delusional world anyway so not understanding satire isn't suprising.
projectsplat
11-07-2006, 05:08 PM
that is farkin brilliant. how is it that any intelligent person can read the onion without realising that they are taking the piss. oh, hang on. maybe i just answered my question....
Martin.au
11-07-2006, 05:48 PM
Beautiful, just beautiful.
Binaural
11-07-2006, 05:54 PM
Great find! I read that article the first time around and I thought it was freaking hillarious. The fact some idiot god-botherer thinks it was serious is just the icing on a deliciously ironic cake :D
tu plang
11-07-2006, 06:06 PM
did you read his reply on the home page? bahaha gold.
Either way, I think I did a good job of turning the “satire” right back at them, don’t you?
Dig up, stupid.
ooow oow oow, best part is he admits he believed it.
Martin.au
11-07-2006, 06:27 PM
did you read his reply on the home page? bahaha gold.
Dig up, stupid.
ooow oow oow, best part is he admits he believed it.
Now what I love about that is the quotes around the word "satire".
Lowrider#1
13-07-2006, 06:12 PM
Hmm... Interesting. Especially the part in which she mentions having a baby she will not be able to support.
(Opening a can o' worms here... feel free to voice your opinion(s))
When you think about it, wouldn't be ending the baby's life before it encounters the world be better than it going through it's life as a lower-class citizen?? She said that she would not be able to adequate the child, meaning that, basically, the child would most likely have a terrible upbringing, or sent off somewhere as soon as it is old enough to go to an orphanage or foster home and never know its mother.
Sort of a 'never know if you never go' thing. Like, people can live their whole lives without, say, peering over a certain fence that they walk past every morning on their way to work. It didn't really affect them, did it?
That and the fact that it's not technically able to be murdered until it is out of the womb. I'm not totally certain of the laws and such and such, so feel free to inform me on such things.
Then again, whose fault is it that she didn't use protection in the first place?? But on another note, it doesn't mention in what circumstances the conception took place. If she was raped, she certainly doesn't want to have a rapist's child. Or if she was forced by a loved one, or whatever. Maybe date-raped. Who knows?
Odds are, she just made a mistake. And finally, it's her morals that she, and she alone, have to contend with. If, as it mentions, she sees a baby and it makes her cry because she wishes that she kept hers, it's her problem. Nobody else's.
In conclusion, it's all about morals. Yours are different to another person's, and theirs are different to the person next to them. You can't keep everyone happy.
johnny
13-07-2006, 06:20 PM
Fundementalism is like being blind but convinced your imagination is reality.
brisneyland
13-07-2006, 06:29 PM
Hmm... Interesting. Especially the part in which she mentions having a baby she will not be able to support.
Uhhh.... WTF? Was your mum's coathanger faulty?
gravelclimber
13-07-2006, 08:40 PM
Hmm... Interesting. Especially the part in which she mentions having a baby she will not be able to support.
(Opening a can o' worms here... feel free to voice your opinion(s))
When you think about it, wouldn't be ending the baby's life before it encounters the world be better than it going through it's life as a lower-class citizen?? She said that she would not be able to adequate the child, meaning that, basically, the child would most likely have a terrible upbringing, or sent off somewhere as soon as it is old enough to go to an orphanage or foster home and never know its mother.
Sort of a 'never know if you never go' thing. Like, people can live their whole lives without, say, peering over a certain fence that they walk past every morning on their way to work. It didn't really affect them, did it?
That and the fact that it's not technically able to be murdered until it is out of the womb. I'm not totally certain of the laws and such and such, so feel free to inform me on such things.
Then again, whose fault is it that she didn't use protection in the first place?? But on another note, it doesn't mention in what circumstances the conception took place. If she was raped, she certainly doesn't want to have a rapist's child. Or if she was forced by a loved one, or whatever. Maybe date-raped. Who knows?
Odds are, she just made a mistake. And finally, it's her morals that she, and she alone, have to contend with. If, as it mentions, she sees a baby and it makes her cry because she wishes that she kept hers, it's her problem. Nobody else's.
In conclusion, it's all about morals. Yours are different to another person's, and theirs are different to the person next to them. You can't keep everyone happy.
You can't be serious!?!!? Shit...........maybe you are. Please look up "satire" in the dictionary and maybe, just maybe, you'll understand why I posted this. And if you still don't get it......the Onion (www.theonion.com) is a great source of factual entirely 100% true not-made-up information that's not in the slightest bit funny. You should look to it for all your news.
brisneyland
13-07-2006, 09:03 PM
.the Onion (www.theonion.com) is a great source of factual entirely 100% true not-made-up information that's not in the slightest bit funny. You should look to it for all your news.
visions of kid running home to mum in Toowoomba yelling "mum, dolphins have evolved opposable thumbs!"
You can't keep everyone happy.
Maybe, but we can do our best to make em laugh!
Even if some people dont get it
Pete J
13-07-2006, 09:23 PM
Maybe, but we can do our best to make em laugh!
Come on funny man, make me laugh!! :p
Come on funny man, make me laugh!! :p
hmmm,
no.;)
floody
14-07-2006, 12:18 PM
Fundamentalism is like being blind but convinced your imagination is reality.
Apart from the spelling mistake in fundamentalism, that is about as perfect a summation as I've seen.
Top work Johnny.
TonyG
14-07-2006, 12:42 PM
(Opening a can o' worms here... feel free to voice your opinion(s)).
Okay
Then again, whose fault is it that she didn't use protection in the first place?? .
I'm guessing your parents have had that same question put to them.
Odds are, she just made a mistake. .
God, how embarrassing for her.
johnny
14-07-2006, 12:49 PM
Apart from the spelling mistake in fundamentalism, Bloody school teachers :rolleyes:
:p
brisneyland
14-07-2006, 02:50 PM
I'm guessing your parents have had that same question put to them.
Or a coathanger in the carpark.
Oh my...
Then again, it's always the ones furtherest from the front line that make the most noise. Who'd bet Pete is probably a white middle aged middle class Christian man in a stable marriage? Just the sort of person to campaign against abortion, an entirely necessary thing for many.
While I don't really care either way for the abortion debate, I don't think anyone's background or living conditions should matter when it comes to deciding what is "right" and what is "wrong". The debate SHOULD be able to be held without having to resort to "Oh you wouldn't understand because your life has been easy" or anything along those lines. IF you were to consider abortion to be murder, then it shouldn't matter why the abortion needs to be performed - you'd still consider it to be the deliberate taking of an innocent life. Likewise, if you consider it to be acceptable (ie not "murder"), the same would apply - it wouldn't be murder/wrong under any circumstances. The only time killing another human being (against their will, ie not euthanasia) is justified (legally and usually morally) is when that person poses an imminent threat to you. If a baby doesn't pose a threat to the life of the mother (um, or father), which would be the case for 90% of abortions, then whether or not abortion is "wrong" should be decided IRRESPECTIVE of the living conditions of the parents.
TonyG
14-07-2006, 03:43 PM
satire!!!!
satire!!!!
Relevance!!!!! I was responding to Rik's post regarding the guy's reaction (to the piece which I do realise was satire) and his opinions.
toodles
14-07-2006, 04:16 PM
The only time killing another human being (against their will, ie not euthanasia) is justified (legally and usually morally) is when that person poses an imminent threat to you.
Bullcrap. What if they pose a threat to someone else? What if they're in a coma and brain dead? What if they're talking during the movie?
TonyG
14-07-2006, 04:21 PM
Relevance!!!!! I was responding to Rik's post regarding the guy's reaction (to the piece which I do realise was satire) and his opinions.
Sorry, thought you missed it.
No_Style
14-07-2006, 04:50 PM
What if they're talking during the movie?
Well sh*t eh....
We had better get the bastards for that :D
brisneyland
14-07-2006, 06:12 PM
What if they're talking during the movie?
what if they ride a turner?
:p
If you guys want to have a real, legitimate discussion about abortion, start another thread. This one should be devoted to flaming a.)people who are so fuckin retarded they do not understand the concept of satire, b.)the fairer sex, because tonight, just tonight, I really don't like them*.
*have not been drinking - belch.
Lowrider#1
14-07-2006, 06:18 PM
Great.. I just made a complete ass of myself.
Sorry for not knowing what the hell "The Onion" was all about.
I am not in any way a representative of any person whom inhabits toowoomba.
:o Hmm..... Feeling Rather Stupid...
johnny
14-07-2006, 06:20 PM
Great.. I just made a complete ass of myself.
Sorry for not knowing what the hell "The Onion" was all about.
I am not in any way a representative of any person whom inhabits toowoomba.
:o Hmm..... Feeling Rather Stupid...Haha, well said and well taken!
Nice one mate :D
toodles
14-07-2006, 06:33 PM
I am not in any way a representative of any person whom inhabits toowoomba.
Must... not.. insult... hillbillies...
Nah, nice retraction mate.
luke.b
15-07-2006, 02:57 PM
what if they ride a turner?
What about an STP?? Naa, we won't go into all that again. I didn't read the whole article, that little snippet was enough while I'm trying to eat. Do you realise how hard it is to laugh, breathe and eat at the same time?
Bullcrap. What if they pose a threat to someone else? What if they're in a coma and brain dead? What if they're talking during the movie?
Fair call if they pose a threat to somebody else... but if they're in a coma and brain dead, then chances are you're LETTING them die rather than killing them. And if they talked during the movie, that's considered suicide.
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